


Life is so simple when I am with you

by frenchkiss



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Blow Jobs, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Smut, University Liam, Younger Zayn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-04
Updated: 2014-07-04
Packaged: 2018-02-07 11:21:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,721
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1897137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/frenchkiss/pseuds/frenchkiss
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Liam rings the doorbell and steps back, shoving his hands in his pockets nonchalantly. After twenty seconds or so the door opens and that’s when Liam’s entire everything does a complete rotation.</p><p>Because it’s Zayn who answers the door but it’s not <em>Zayn</em>. Zayn was oversized Nike hoodies and plastic chavvy necklaces and an almost shaved head but now… Zayn is… <em>pretty?</em></p><p> </p><p>Or the one where Zayn is a manipulative little shit, Liam wants a someone, Harry can sleep through anything, Louis wants to give Liam a kick up the arse and Niall's everyone's fave. Featuring Doniya as Liam's bestie.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Life is so simple when I am with you

Liam is quite drunk.

Except at this stage, quite drunk might be an understatement. He’s got a cup of vodka in one hand and he’s swaying in time to whatever pop song the club is blaring. He’s lost the people he’s come out with, but that’s okay because he’s drunk enough to carry on dancing without a care in the world.

“Liam? Liam?”

That could be Doniya but that also could be anyone at this point. Liam ignores it and carries on dancing as he downs the rest of his drink, the DJ swapping the song to something slightly more upbeat.

“Oh for fuck’s sake, Liam,” Doniya snaps, plucking his empty cup out of his hand and dropping it to the floor. She wraps a hand around his wrist and tugs him towards the exit and he follows like a puppet, too drunk to really know what’s going on.

“Liam, you arse,” she snaps once they’re outside in the cold March air. “Ditching us for pretty boys in clubs while Danny and I rip our hair out looking for you.”

“This one was a very pretty boy,” Liam says solemnly.

“Yes he was, wasn’t he?” Doniya drawls sarcastically, pulling out her phone and dialling Danny’s number. “Hi babe, I’ve found him. Yeah, I know. We’re out the front anyway. See you in a sec. Love you too.”

“Why doesn’t anybody love me too?” Liam whines, wrapping his flailing arms around Doniya’s shoulders. She sighs and squeezes him back.

“Because you’re too wonderful for everyone you’ve met so far,” she recites the same thing she tells him every time he drinks too much vodka and gets weepy. Liam snuffles into her shoulder and sways again, making them both stumble. “Alright then, you, just stand still a minute until Danny gets here and then it’s bedtime.”

“Bedtime, bedtime,” Liam babbles. He lets Doniya hold him steady as Danny arrives and signals them a cab. He rests his head on her shoulder and lets his eyes close as the cab speeds back towards the campus and Doniya's fingers card through his fringe.

He could tell a hundred stories like this – he gets drunk off his arse, kisses or fucks some random pretty boy (or sometimes an ugly boy; vodka renders him pretty easy) and Doniya picks up the pieces. If she didn’t promise that she loved him so much, Liam would be incredibly confused as to why she bothered.

She frogmarches him up the stairs of his building to his flat and steadies him as she pats his pockets down for his keys. Everything is still blurred and spinning ever so slightly so as he stumbles down the hallway to his bedroom he manages to knock into three other doors, loudly.

A few moments later Louis flings his door open with a glare and Doniya gives him a sheepish shrug. “Sorry, Lou babe, I’m trying.”

“I know, darling,” Louis sighs, his expression softening. “It’s just, I’ve got Harry in here and he’s got a test tomorrow so I need him to stay asleep.”

“Louis!” Liam yells, tripping back and engulfing him into a clumsy hug. “Why don’t you love me either?”

Louis sighs again and pats Liam on the back. “Not in here, Li, please. Harry’s asleep.”

“Oh yeah,” Liam hiccups. “Harry. I like Harry. That’s why you don’t love me, you love Harry.”

“I do love Harry, yeah,” Louis says. “C’mon now though, bed for you. It’s half past three and I’m pretty sure you have a lecture at ten.”

“Who cares?” Liam slurs, letting Louis guide him towards his own door. Doniya unlocks it and they guide Liam towards the bed, pulling faces as she gingerly steps over all the rubbish and clothes on the floor. Louis reaches down to unbutton Liam’s skinny jeans and helps him shuffle out of them while Liam giggles.

“Last time you did this we were shagging, remember that Lou?”

Louis laughs softly and Doniya shakes her head with a groan.

“Course I remember, Li.”

“And then you had to ruin it by falling in love with someone else,” Liam continues with a yawn. “Even though I wasn’t in love with you and I’m still not but it would have been nice to fall in love, don’t you think?”

“Liam!” Doniya hisses, covering his mouth with her hand. “Shut up babe, before you say something you regret.”

“I nearly got a shag tonight,” Liam continues dopily, “but he ran off with this girl after we snogged a bit. He’s not gonna fall in love with me either.”

“C’mon Li,” Louis coaxes, ignoring him in favour of scooping up his legs and directing his long body into a laying position. “Sleep now. I’ll get you some water and some Nurofen.”

“Do you hate me?” Liam whimpers into his pillow as Doniya tucks a plastic bag into his bin and places it near his head.

“Of course we don’t, you stupid git.” Louis says as he returns with the water and pills. “We just wish you wouldn’t do this so much.”

“Sorry,” Liam mumbles, eyes drooping closed. “Tell Harry I’m sorry too.”

“I will,” Louis assures him, leaning down to press a kiss onto Liam’s forehead. “Night fuckface.”

“Night Liam babe,” Doniya says, mirroring Louis and kissing his forehead. “I’ll come by to check on you in the morning, you mess.”

“Love you,” Liam slurs and Doniya nods, squeezing his fingers before flicking the light and leaving the room.

“Jesus, Doni,” Louis says, rocking on his heels outside his door. “Thanks for bringing him home safe.”

“You know I always will,” Doniya says, tying her hair up with one of her bracelets. “I’m sorry he chats so much shit.”

Louis shrugs. “It’s fine. I’d rather he did it when it’s just us than in front of Harry, to be honest.”

Doniya grimaces. “I’m really fucking worried, Lou. It’s getting a bloody lot worse. I’m gonna have to have words with him. I had to physically stop him going into the loos with this lad, the little fucker.”

“I’m going to give the boy such a swift kicking up the arse in the morning. This is the third time he’s woken me up in the last two weeks. It’s not healthy.”

“At least he didn’t bring the ugly fuck back and shag him loudly.”

Louis pulls a face. “He’s so fucking gross. He really needs to stop pulling the uglies; he can do so much better than half the blokes he brings home.”

Doniya nods and sighs. “I’m gonna head off, I think. Danny went home because he just gets angry when Liam’s like this so I said I’d head back pretty soon.”

“Want me to walk you?”

“No, you go back to your boy. Sleep well, Lou.”

“You too, darling.”

The next day, Liam wakes up with a banging headache and the taste of death in his mouth. He necks the Nurofen next to his head and wobbles up into a seating position. He cannot remember how the fuck he got home but judging by the tablets and the bin by his head, he’s ninety percent sure it was Doniya. 

That comforting thought is broken for a second when he realises he’s not wearing trousers but there’s no wet patch, no condom and he’s not sore or covered in love bites, so he concludes he must have pulled them off himself.

Groaning, he rolls over and fishes around for his phone on the floor. He picks it up and realises that he’s slept into his lecture but it’s his only thing on a Thursday so right now he couldn’t care less. He lies there for a few more minutes, gathering his strength, before pushing himself out of bed and towards the bathroom in nothing but his boxers and his button down shirt. 

“Hey Liam!” Louis yells from the kitchen door and Liam grimaces.

“Hey Lou,” he croaks, using a wall to support himself as he stumbles down the hallway to the bathroom. He pisses and washes his hands, splashing some water on his hungover face as he grimaces at just how shit he looks in the mirror.

“You’re an absolute arse, you know that?” Louis’ voice calls through the door and Liam groans.

“What did I do?” he says worriedly as he unlocks the door.

“Tried to get into my room,” Louis says, folding his arms. “And then asked why I wasn’t in love with you.”

“Oh fuck,” Liam moans, his face in his hands. “Louis, I am so so sorry. I didn’t mean it, honestly.”

Louis scoffs. “Mate, we shagged twice; I _hardly_ think that’s enough for you to harbour a secret and undying love for me.”

“’m still sorry,” Liam mumbles, peering out at Louis between his fingers. “And I definitely need to ring Doniya and tell her thank you.”

“You definitely really do,” Louis says, shoving Liam back towards his bedroom. “Shower, ring her and buy her lunch.” His expression softens. “Liam… you’re… your behaviour is worrying us. I don’t wanna sound like a prude but going out five times a week and drinking yourself stupid to the point where you can’t remember who you shagged isn’t good. You know that, don’t you?”

Liam scrubs a hand over his face. In all honesty, he’d never really put much thought into how much he was going out but when Louis says it like that… fuck.

“I don’t…” Liam starts. “I didn’t even…”

Louis steps forward and wraps a comforting hand around his wrist. “Look, Li, you’re, like, my best friend here apart from Harry, obviously, and I wanna keep you around. It’s just that exams are in two months and I don’t want you to bomb out and not come back, you know?”

Liam nods, ashamed. How had he not even realised?

“Look,” Louis sighs, “I don’t want to lecture; that’s Doniya’s job.” They both snort a small laugh. “Just… think about it, yeah?”

“Thanks, Lou,” Liam says in a small voice, tugging him in for a hug. “I’m sorry I woke you and Harry.”

“You didn’t wake that lump,” Louis says with an eye roll, though it’s fond. “He sleeps like the dead, thank Christ. I, on the other hand, am unfortunately quite a light sleeper; a wonderful gift you pick up when you’ve got random little sisters crawling into your bed because they’ve had a nightmare, but a curse when you’re living in halls with some knob who likes to crash home at arse o’clock in the morning.”

Liam hangs his head.

“Hey,” Louis says, a lot gentler than before. “I’m not having a go. I’m just worried, yeah? Even Niall is worried, and you know if he’s taken himself away from that sodding guitar for five seconds to pay attention to the outside world, that’s when you need to look into the problem.” Liam nods mopily, leaning back against the wall.

“Go shower,” Louis says, nudging him with his shoulder. “Go and buy your long-suffering best friend lunch and give her a hug from me. And _smile_ , Liam! You’re not dying, darling.”

Liam offers a small smile and Louis chuckles, saluting him exaggeratedly. They both head back into their rooms and Liam grabs his towel before trudging back to the bathroom. He cracks out a quick wank to make up for his lack of getting any last night and washes all the product out of his hair slowly, relishing the way the warm water feels against his aching limbs.

He shuts off the shower and dries his hair before wrapping the towel around his waist and padding back to his room, locking the door and hanging his towel on the back of it. He takes a deep breath and almost chokes on how fucking _rancid_ it smells in here – like sweat and boy and bad sex and pity, so he throws open the curtains and then the window, allowing fresh air to circulate for probably the first time since he moved in. He sticks his phone into his docking station so it can charge and he turns up some Usher as he changes and scoops up last night’s dirty clothes, dumping them into his already over-flowing laundry basket.

The music cuts off and is replaced by Marimba so Liam plucks the phone out, answering the call and pressing it to his ear. “Hi,” he says sheepishly.

“How’s your head?” drawls Doniya. Liam can practically hear her eyes rolling through the microphone.

“Fine. Thanks for the tablets. And for, you know, making sure I didn’t pass out in an alleyway.”

Doniya sighs. “The tablets were Louis, actually. And any time, babe. I take it you skipped your lecture?”

“Um, yeah, sorry.”

“It’s not me you have to apologise to, Liam,” Doniya says exasperatedly. 

Liam groans. “Can I buy you lunch? You know, to say thanks and stuff. And to, like, talk.”

“Yeah, alright,” Doniya says, perking up at the mention of food. “How does Wetherspoons sound?”

“Am I ever going to turn down a Wetherspoons?” Liam grins, pleased that she doesn’t sound so pissed off anymore. “Meet you there at half twelve?”

“Sure thing, babe!” she says. “Mwuah mwuah!”

Liam spends the next hour and a bit tidying up his room, which is an absolute pigsty by anyone’s standards. He chucks away two binbags full of empty beer and vodka bottles, as well as condom wrappers and tissues and a pair of boxers that _aren’t_ his, which makes him feel a bit sick.

It wasn’t like he had any intention of sleeping with this many people at uni, never ever. Back home he was shy by nature and had a few close friends, Doniya and Ant and Danny and Andy, but Ant and Andy were at completely different unis and he’s pretty sure Danny is starting to like him less and less.

Liam had made the uneasy decision to come out (although it was hardly a secret amongst close friends) just before he left for uni, losing his virginity at the end of sixth form party to a football player (incredibly awkward and fumbled) and then proceeding to start going to gay bars over the summer with Doniya in tow. His parents hadn’t been the most pleased, to say the least, but Doniya stuck by him. Then, he came away to uni and he felt freer than he ever had, away from the parents who didn’t think he’d ever get in and away from the small, unforgiving British town that was home.

It’s just, Doniya’s been with Danny since they were sixteen and Louis found Harry in the third week of uni and even Niall – sweet, unassuming, oblivious to the world Niall has a girlfriend, some gorgeous blonde called Perrie he met through his singing gigs.

So although he feels terrible for it, he can’t deny to himself that he is a little jealous. Seeing his best friends cuddled up on their beds as they all cram into one of their tiny bedrooms to watch films, the constant third wheeling, the loud noises of squeaking bedframes and Louis’ long drawn out moans as he’s trying to sleep - he _wants_ that. He wants a someone but right now he’ll settle for an anyone.

He stares at his reflection again and he nearly blanches. He looks gaunt and tired, dark bags under his usually bright brown eyes and spots threatening to burst up through his skin. He sighs, grabbing his hair gel to try and make himself look vaguely presentable. Once satisfied that he looks slightly better than an extra from The Walking Dead, he stuffs his keys, phone and wallet into his pockets and grabs the binbags. He calls his goodbyes to Louis and locks up his room, dumping the binbags in the huge bins outside his building before starting off on the ten minute walk to the pub.

Doniya is already inside, made up and beautiful as always. She reaches out and grabs his hand as he sits down, squeezing it reassuringly.

“Liam,” she says, bringing his hand to her mouth so she can kiss his knuckles. “I’m not here to shout at you. You’re my best fucking friend, you know. I just want you to be happy. And safe. And I also want the breakfast burger with extra cheese and a large Pepsi.”

Liam snorts, sliding out of his chair to hug her properly. “I’m sorry,” he mumbles pathetically into her hair. “You shouldn’t have to be my keeper.”

“No, I shouldn’t,” Doniya agrees, pulling back and rolling her eyes. “Go and order my damn food.”

Twenty minutes later and Liam is savouring the taste of a greasy, delicious, hangover-curing burger with a huge side of chips. Doniya grins over her mountain of food as Liam groans dramatically at the first bite. “So good!” he splutters with a grin.

“Beautiful, darling,” Doniya coos, using her manicured thumb to wipe away some barbeque sauce from Liam’s cheek. “Thank you for this, Li, it’s bloody delish.”

“Not a problem, you earned it,” Liam says, flushing slightly. Doniya sighs, putting her burger back on the plate and wiping her hand on her paper napkin.

“Look, babe, you know… you know what you’re doing isn’t healthy, right?”

Liam wrinkles his nose. “No, believe me; I decided to clear out my room today because I couldn’t fucking stand it anymore and I just… I don’t want to live like that anymore. You should have seen how many condom wrappers were under my mattress.”

“Please spare me,” Doniya shudders. “I just worry about you so bloody much, you arse…”

“I’ve been such a fucking knob since coming here,” Liam agrees, angrily stabbing his fork into his chips. “I’m pretty sure Danny hates me now and I’m almost certain Louis is on the way there…”

“Danny does not hate you, you little shit,” Doniya rolls her eyes. “He’s just very protective of me, well,” she sighs. “He doesn’t like how much shit I go through for you when I went through so much shit the past two years, what with Baba and with…”

Liam groans. “I am such a twat.”

“Yes, you are,” Doniya snaps. “But you’re also my best fucking friend and you were there for me when Baba died just as much as he was and you’re just as important to me, okay?”

“I don’t deserve to be.”

“Can you stop with the fucking pity party, Liam?” Doniya retorts. “I will pick up the pieces for you as long as you need me to here at uni but it doesn’t mean I’m happy about it. I want you to change because you want to change, you understand? I don’t want you to get thrown out and end up back home in that godforsaken dead end town but at the rate you’re going…”

“I’m gonna do it,” Liam interrupts, eyes wide. “I need to pass first year; I can’t go back and live there again for any longer than a summer.”

“Do you have the notes to revise for your exams?”

“Some and some,” Liam says, taking a sip of his Pepsi. “I think a lot of it is online and a lot of lecturers record themselves so if I just, like, lock myself in the library I think I’ll get there.”

“Of course you’ll get there,” Doniya says softly.

“I just, I can’t believe I didn’t even realise I had gotten this bad,” Liam says.

“What made you realise?”

“Well, for a start I nearly choked on the smell of my own bedroom,” Liam says and Doniya cackles, covering her mouth with her hand so food doesn’t fly everywhere. “So I opened the window and I just… I took a good look at myself this morning and I had a chat with Louis and it’s like, this isn’t who I want to be. And according to Louis I keep chatting shit about wanting to be in love with him and I just…” His whole body sags. “I don’t want meaningless sex anymore. I want a someone.”

“Oh Li,” Doniya says sympathetically, reaching across the table for his hand. “I’ve been trying to tell you this for months now, darling. You’re not gonna find your someone shagging half the university campus.”

“I didn’t pull last night, did I?” Liam asks, suddenly tense.

Doniya shakes her head with a small smile. “No, babe. But you did keep babbling about how the boy you tried to blow in the toilets wasn’t going to love you because he left with a girl.”

Liam makes a noise in the back of his throat as he hides his face in his hands. “Well, fuck.”

“Liam!” Doniya laughs, grabbing his hand in hers. “You’re going to find it when you stop looking! Honestly, that’s how it worked with me and Danny, Harry and Louis, even bloody Niall for crying out loud.” She grins around a chip. “And if you don’t find anyone here, I’m sure Zaynie back home still fancies you.”

Liam groans and flushes, the same way he always has whenever his friends make fun of him for the way Doniya’s little brother turns into a stuttering mess around him, flushing bright red and hiding behind his hair.

“I’m joking, Liam! I really don’t want you shagging my baby brother, don’t worry!”

Liam grins despite himself. “I don’t tell you this enough but I love you a whole fucking lot, Doni.”

“So do I,” Doniya says with a grin. “I never stopped believing this was just a bad phase, you know? You’ll pass this fucking year and then next year you and Louis and Niall and Harry can live in that shitty house together and have the time of your fucking lives, properly this time.”

“I guess I need to apologise to them too,” Liam says sheepishly.

“We all still fucking adore you, Liam,” Doniya says with a nod of agreement. “You’ll make it better, I know you will.”

When they leave the pub and go their separate ways, Liam lets himself back in his flat and knocks straight on Niall’s bedroom door. He’s pulled into a long hug and ends up sat in his room for hours, apologising over and over again, feeling even more of a fuck up when Niall tells him they’re all fucking brothers and they were gonna be there through it all anyway because they fucking live together, for fuck’s sake.

Niall cuddles him until they hear the front door open and Louis and Harry plod into the flat. Liam calls them into Niall’s room and cuddles them both, especially Louis, who gets extra whispered apologies and the promise of a large bottle of vodka for his troubles. Harry cooks them all dinner and they sit in the kitchen laughing until their lungs hurt (something Liam can’t remember doing in ages; when he’s not going out he usually just sleeps) and by the time he collapses into bed at half eleven he feels better than he has in a while.

Over the coming months, he works his arse off to make up for the fact that he hasn’t really done any work since his first term. He essentially moves in to the library, setting up a regular table with Louis and Danny and studying until late into the evening. He starts setting alarms and going to his morning lectures and seminars, making notes for the first time in months and finally understanding what the hell his course is about.

And by some miracle (like maybe the thirteen coffees he drank the day before his longest exam had some sort of Popeye effect and he became a temporary superhuman) he manages to pass the year. It’s not a high pass and he’s going to have to work his arse off for the next two years, but he does it.

He gets his results from the department and opens them on the walk back across campus to his flat. Letting himself in, still completely baffled that he’d actually _fucking managed this_ , he’s tackled to the ground by two short but powerful bodies as Niall seizes the results from his hand.

“My boy passed!” he screams and Louis cheers from somewhere near Liam’s armpit as Harry, Doniya and Perrie survey the scene with fond yet exasperated expressions.

Some higher power has allowed them to all pass first year so they go out that night. It’s awkward at first with everyone watching Liam like a hawk as he orders a round of shots.

“Come on, guys, I’ve passed the year! I’m not a fucking relapsing alcoholic, I wanna celebrate!”

“Are you gonna pull?” Doniya asks tentatively from under Danny’s arm. 

“I’m not going out to,” Liam says firmly, handing out the glasses of tequila to everyone. “Let’s celebrate!”

“Mazel tov!” the already drunk Harry yells, necking his shot and tugging Louis in for a sloppy kiss. Doniya pulls him in for a quick one-armed hug and they head to the dance floor, Katy Perry’s new single blaring across the speakers.

Liam ends up snogging a couple of blokes but he finds himself not wanting to go home with them at all. He hasn’t been out for just over two months and it’s just nice to have a few drinks and dance with people. He’s massively seventh wheeling, he knows he is, but that’s part of his reasoning for not pulling.

Because Niall and Perrie have their arms around each other’s middles as they dance with their foreheads pressed together, giant smiles across their faces and it almost feels like something intimate is being interrupted by watching them. Because Danny is twirling Doniya exaggeratedly around the dance floor, laughing loudly as she accidentally knocks into people and kissing the embarrassment of her face. Because Harry and Louis can’t stop filthily grinding against each other but the second someone else tries to get involved they’re turned away with possessive glares.

That’s what Liam craves.

After that night (when he falls asleep exhausted but blissed out after a drunken wank) he dates a little bit before he heads back home for the summer but none of them go well. The first one forgets his name halfway through their meal so Liam frantically texts Louis under the table to call him and get him out of there. The second one (one of Harry’s hipster friends) turns out to be someone Liam’s pulled before but doesn’t remember, which puts a rather awkward spin on the evening. 

Doniya hugs him tight after both disasters and tells him he’s too good for both stupid boys. “You’ll find someone infinitely better one day, darling, I promise you,” she coos as Liam lies in hers and Danny’s bed, buried into her blankets. “You need to stop trying to force it, Li. It won’t happen straight away, it’ll happen when you least expect, I promise.”

Liam has no idea how true those words are until it happens.  
+  
His sister comes to pick him up from uni because there’s not enough space in Danny’s car for all his stuff as well. He gives everyone a long hug and promises to visit them during the summer and then they start the long car journey home.

It’s awkward being home for a bit because his parents are still acting a little on edge around him. His holidays were short because over Christmas he’d had to lock himself in his room writing all the essays he’d neglected in his first term and over Easter he’d ended up just staying at uni with Louis and Harry to revise, so he hadn’t seen them often this year.

He loves his parents, he does, it’s just they tread around him like him coming out was a dangerous move and they’re not sure how to act. Which is what he expected, it is, because Liam did know that his coming out wasn’t going to be easy on anybody, but it does make him want to get the fuck out from under their scrutinising eyes, like, now.

He goes over to Doniya’s one night when over dinner his father tells him that he knows of a girl he can date if he wants to keep his options open. His mother’s cutlery clashes harshly with her plate as she drops them nervously, hissing a “Geoff, really!” at her husband, who simply shrugs.

After taking his plate to the kitchen he grabs his shoes, shouting that he’s going out and he isn’t sure when he’s going to be back. He sighs as he clips down his pathway, tired and exasperated.

He walks up the familiar path to Doniya’s house, revelling in the fact that it looks exactly the same as it always has. Even after Yaser’s death, which hit the family really fucking hard, Trisha made sure to keep everything as normal as possible, right down to the tiny purple flowers that line the garden path.

Liam rings the doorbell and steps back, shoving his hands in his pockets nonchalantly. After twenty seconds or so the door opens and that’s when Liam’s entire everything does a complete rotation.

Because it’s Zayn who answers the door but it’s not _Zayn_. Zayn was oversized Nike hoodies and plastic chavvy necklaces and an almost shaved head but now… Zayn is… _pretty?_

He’s grown his hair out and it’s styled in a messy quiff, extenuating the fact that he’s lost whatever puppy fat he had and now has the smoothest cheekbones Liam’s ever seen. He’s wearing a loose fitting black top, which shows off… is that a fucking _tattoo_ on his collarbone?!

Liam is speechless. His best friend’s little brother has turned into one of the most beautiful people Liam’s ever seen in the space of a year. If he was in a club right now, Liam would definitely be trying to hump his leg. No, he wouldn’t. This is _Zayn_ , for fuck’s sake.

“Z-Zayn?” he stammers out instead, remembering that he actually needs to speak right now.

Zayn’s face breaks out into a massive grin and he steps out the way so Liam can get into the house, shutting the door behind him.

“Good to see you, Liam,” he says in a deep voice that Liam doesn’t ever remember belonging to the boy he knew a year ago. 

“You too,” Liam says nervously. He will not turn to jelly over Zayn, he _will not turn to jelly over Zayn._ “How, er, how have you been?”

“Good, yeah,” Zayn says, leaning against the wall casually. “Got accepted into uni. Gonna study art.”

“Hey, that’s great!” Liam says enthusiastically. “Whereabouts?”

“Same as you and Doniya,” Zayn says, looking up at Liam through his long eyelashes. “Mum wanted me near family so it seemed the easiest compromise.”

Liam nods. “That’s fair enough. You, er, you look good.”

Zayn flushes at that, ducking his head, but Liam can still see his smile. “Thanks. So do you.” He looks up again and then walks past Liam to head upstairs, flashing him a grin as he makes sure to bump his shoulder slightly. “Doniya! Liam’s here!” he calls as he jogs upstairs, wiggling his hips slightly and Liam’s breathe hitches.

“Li? Come up!” Doniya yells. Liam sighs, kicks off his shoes and pads up the stairs, walking past Zayn’s room and towards Doniya’s room. He lets himself into her room and flops onto her bed straight away, miserable and now confused.

“What’s happened?” Doniya says, concerned, shuffling across from her desk to bundle Liam into a hug.

“Just…” Liam groans into her shoulder. “Mum and Dad. Trying to set me up with girls so I know to keep my options open.”

“Oh bloody hell,” she mutters, stroking a hand up and down his back. “Ignore them, babe, and you know you’re always welcome here. Mum misses you, you know, and Zayn’s been asking after you, of course.”

Liam groans again. “I’ve seen him already. When the hell did he grow up?”

Doniya snorts. “I forgot you haven’t seen him in, like, a year. He’s changed, hasn’t he?”

“I’ll say,” Liam says, rolling onto his side so she can’t see him blush. He exhales sharply and Doniya pulls him closer. 

“Are you okay?”

“I’m just tired, Doni,” he breathes out. “I’m tired of this town and I’m tired of not knowing if I want to please people or if I don’t care and I’m just…”

“Hey, hey,” Doniya coaxes him quiet, kissing his temple reassuringly. “You’ve got me and Lou and Niall and Harry and Danny for as long as you want to keep us around. Your parents will come around, yeah? It’s just all new for this shit town. But Zayn was saying that quite a few people in his sixth form came out so it’s getting better.”

“Wait, so Zayn’s out now?” Liam says, lifting his head curiously.

“Li, babe, the boy’s been crushing on you since he knew what a crush was,” Doniya says with an eye roll. “Did you not pick up on that?”

“Yeah, but…” Liam flounders for the words. “Like, I didn’t think he was, you know…”

Doniya hits him with a pillow. “You’re so fucking dense.” She stills and lets Liam hug her again. “I think… I think he wanted to wait until Baba… you know. I think he was too scared to do it before.”

“Oh bless him,” Liam says, squeezing her tighter. “Why is this so hard?”

“I don’t know,” Doniya mumbles. “It shouldn’t ever be a problem. You and Zayn would still be in my top five favourite people regardless of whether you took it up the arse or not.”

Liam laughs loudly and Doniya buries her head into his shoulder. “Oh God, I really don’t want to think about either of you taking it up the arse, to be honest.”

“I’m more of a top, if it helps,” Liam tells her, cackling loudly as she hits him with the pillow again. 

“Stop!” she yells and Liam rolls her over, tickling her mercilessly. She screams playfully and tries to bat him away until the door flings open and Trisha stands there, raising a curious eyebrow until she realises it’s Liam.

“Liam!” she says, hurrying over and pulling him in for a hug as he pants for breath.

“Hi Trisha,” he beams, hugging her back tight. “How are you?”

“I’m fine, thanks sunshine,” she grins, holding him at arm’s length. “I thought I was going to have to give dear Doni here a lecture on not having the door shut when Danny’s round.”

“Mum!” Doniya glares and Liam laughs. 

“Sadly, you’ve got me instead. How are the other girls?”

“Both fine. Coping,” she tells him. Liam nods sadly. “Anyway, did you know Zayn is joining you two at uni next year?”

“Yeah, he mentioned; that’s really cool!” Liam says brightly, ignoring the fluttering in his stomach. “Is he excited?”

“Yeah, I think so. Becoming quite the little artist stereotype, that boy. You know he’s gotten eight tattoos since…” She pauses and swallows loudly. “Since...”

Liam whistles and tries to deflect from any mention of Yaser because it’s still red raw. “Eight tattoos?! What of?”

“Oh, I don’t remember. Stupid ones!” she pointedly calls loudly and Zayn yells back an indignant “hey!” from his room.

“Anyway, I’ll leave you two to it. Missed you, Liam, don’t you be a stranger now!”

“He’s going to be round all summer,” Doniya tells her, pulling Liam into her arms. “We get separation anxiety.”

Trisha snorts as she stands up, ruffling Liam’s hair before closing the door. Liam slides into Doniya’s arms properly and they turn on the TV, letting some cooking show run quietly in the background. 

“Hey,” he murmurs into her hair. “The separation anxiety thing… I’m so glad you came to uni with me. Like I know it was shit that you had to take a gap year because of the whole shitty situation but honestly, I couldn’t have gotten through this year without you.”

“Same,” she murmurs back. “You, Danny and Zayn saved my fucking life, Li, I hope you know that.”

“And you’re gonna save mine again by letting me hide here all summer,” he snorts sadly.

“Babe, you’re welcome here whenever you need a place to go, you know that. I start working on Monday from 10-6 and Wali and Saf are going to this summer camp programme thing for bereaved children during the day but Zayn should be in if you want somewhere to come, you know?”

Liam nods and kisses her forehead by way of saying thank you. They watch TV for a little longer and then Danny shows up, fresh from his shift at a local restaurant so Liam bids them goodbye and walks home. 

He may accidentally have a wank thinking of Zayn when he gets home, but that’s strictly between him and his right hand.

*

Liam’s life completely changes the next Tuesday.

He wakes up late and he heads downstairs for breakfast around eleven, unsure if anyone else is actually in the house. He opens the door to the living room and is about to step through to the kitchen when he hears his mother’s voice, talking to someone on her phone.

“I do worry though,” Karen is saying softly, “because it’s just going to be that much harder for him to find someone, you know? I just don’t know why he’s chosen to follow that path.”

Liam’s heart breaks and he stops breathing, turns around and hurries back upstairs. He grabs some clean clothes and dresses quickly before grabbing his phone and keys and thundering out the door. He needs Doniya, like, right now, because he’s so fucking done.

He pounds on the door hurriedly and it’s flung open not by Doniya but of course by Zayn. He’s got stubble littered across his chin and he’s wearing nothing but a pair of boxers and a wife beater, eyes going wide as he looks as Liam’s sweaty self.

“Shit, are you okay?” he asks, opening the door so Liam can get inside. 

“Is Doniya here?” he pants. Zayn shakes his head.

“She’s working until six. Liam, come sit down, Jesus.”

Liam follows Zayn into the living room, flopping down onto the sofa and breathing heavily. Zayn crouches in front of him and tilts his chin up with his finger, eyes scanning over Liam’s face. “Have you been crying?” he asks softly.

Liam shakes his head. “No,” he mumbles. “No, I…”

“Has something really bad happened? Do you want me to call Doniya?”

“No,” Liam says again. “I just… I needed to get out the house and Doniya said I could come here.”

“Do you want a coffee?” Zayn asks tentatively. Liam nods slowly, wiping his eyes on the back of his hand. Zayn disappears and comes back a few minutes later with two steaming mugs. He sets them on the coffee table and sits down on the sofa next to Liam almost sheepishly.

“Do you want to talk about it?” he asks Liam shyly. Liam sighs.

“It’s just… it’s like…” Liam gulps out. “Why is it so difficult for my mum and dad for me to be gay? Why do they think it’s such a bad, bad thing?”

Zayn tenses up next to him. “It’s horrible, isn’t it?” he murmurs. “I’m sorry, Liam.”

Liam sighs and turns to look at him. Fuck, he’s pretty. “Don’t be sorry. It’s just shit, I’m just…”

“Tired of not being allowed to be what you want?” Zayn finishes, looking up through his eyelashes. 

“Y-yeah, exactly,” Liam says. They sit there in silence for a little bit, Zayn playing with a loose thread on his boxers as Liam drinks his coffee, trying not to make it obvious he’s staring at Zayn. He isn’t sure what to do or say because by the sounds of things Zayn knows exactly how he’s feeling but this is _Zayn_ and he’s so fucking conflicted about he feels about everything right now (but especially Zayn). 

He looks up from his mug to find Zayn staring right at him; lips parted slightly and eyes dark. If he leans enough their lips would be touching. His breath hitches with that realisation and it’s really. _really_ fucking tempting but…

“I-I should go,” he says, setting his empty mug down on the coffee table and standing up hurriedly. He really needs to get laid. “Thanks for the coffee.”

“Y-yeah, s-sure,” Zayn stammers, looking away and standing up to show Liam out. Liam staggers past and hurriedly stutters out a goodbye before practically jogging down the path. He gets halfway down the road before he realises he’s left his phone on the sofa so reluctantly jogs back, slowly down and walking reluctantly up the path. He rings the doorbell and stands almost rigidly waiting for the door to open, his mind racing a mile a minute with thoughts of Zayn and kissing Zayn and talking to Zayn and wanting Zayn…

The door flings open and suddenly there’s a pair of lips on his, sucking his bottom lip into their mouth as hands cup his cheeks tightly. He staggers forward, falling into the hallway as his hands grip for Zayn’s waist to steady them both. 

“Whoa, whoa, shit, hold on,” he pants desperately, fingers still digging into Zayn’s sides. “What are we doing?”

“Kissing?” Zayn says, cocking an eyebrow. “I’m making you feel better, c’mon Liam.”

Liam kisses him again harshly because he wants to make sure he wants this, letting Zayn manhandle him against the doorframe. Hands are everywhere; wrapping themselves around Liam’s neck, squeezing Liam’s arse…

“Whoa, whoa, no, wait a second,” Liam says frantically. “We shouldn’t… I mean, I want to, _fuck_ , but Doniya’s gonna kill me. Doniya’s gonna kill us both!”

“I won’t tell if you won’t,” Zayn growls in a sudden display of confidence. His lips are swollen and his hands are still gripping Liam’s arse. Liam would be lying if he said he wasn’t halfway to hard right now. Oh, bollocks.

“I just… I don’t know… you’re Doniya’s kid brother, for fuck’s sake, Zayn!”

“I am not a fucking kid,” Zayn growls. “I’ve wanted you for as long as I can remember and now you look at me like you want me back and I…”

“I do want you back,” Liam sighs, because there’s no point in lying, not when he’s got his hands tangled in Zayn’s hair. He’s going to hell. “Once, okay? We’ll do this once.”

“Deal,” Zayn says and then kisses him again.

Liam’ll be damned if he denies that this isn’t the best kiss he’s had in ages. Granted, he hasn’t had many sober kisses recently but Zayn has a wickedly skilled tongue and his lips are soft and he tastes like coffee and his morning cigarette. They kiss until they’re both well aware of their erections and then Zayn’s pulling away, grinning wickedly as he tugs Liam up the stairs and into his bedroom.

He’s seen the inside of Zayn’s bedroom before, of course, but he’s not seen it for a whole year, and in that time Zayn’s ripped down all his Power Ranger and X-Men posters and replaced them with his own artwork; skilled pencil sketches and canvases with designs spray painted on.

“Fuck,” Liam groans as Zayn yanks him towards the bed, pushing him down and straddling him. “What the hell happened to Doniya’s kid brother?”

“I grew up,” Zayn groans as Liam starts trailing kisses down his chest, over the tattoos on his collarbone. “I came out. I had to change a little bit.” He grins smugly as he cradles Liam’s head. “Do you like it?”

“Like it?” Liam asks incredulously , pinching Zayn’s nipple harshly in the hand that isn’t supporting him upright. “You’re, like, stupid fit. Are you sure you’re still Zayn?”

Zayn grins, gripping the hem of his t-shirt and tugging it up his body as he pushes him down onto his back. He shuffles down so he can tug Liam’s sweatpants and boxers down too; pressing kisses into the swell of his tummy. “You’re stupid fit too,” he says, gripping Liam’s thighs and spreading them apart. “And if I only get this once I’m going to make it fucking count.”

His hand snakes up the delicate skin of Liam’s thighs and he drags his fingers lightly up Liam’s length, eventually gripping it loosely and swiping a thumb over the sensitive head. Liam props himself up on his elbows to ask Zayn what he means by that but loses the ability to form a coherent sentence when Zayn opens his mouth wide and sinks down, the tight wet heat covering half his length in one swift movement.

“Jesus shit,” Liam groans, falling back onto the mattress. His hands fist themselves into Zayn’s messy hair, guiding Zayn up and down as he sucks him in earnest. His hand grips around what his mouth can’t reach and jerks him in time with his slurps, eventually pulling up enough to simply suckle the head while still jerking him.

“Top or bottom?” he asks, his fist still pumping away.

It takes Liam a second, his brain so pleasure-fuddled that Zayn’s words almost pass him by. “Err… t-top, if that’s okay.”

“Perfect,” Zayn says, his voice throaty and fucked out. “Lube’s under my pillow.” 

Liam scrambles up the bed, seizing the lube and sitting upright. His cock slaps uncomfortably against his stomach, smearing precum across his abs. Zayn’s vanished but he returns a second later, a condom in his hand. 

“Nicked from Doni, don’t want to think about it,” he says with a grimace as he steps in between the V of Liam’s legs. Liam pulls him down into a kiss so they’re lying against the pillows.

“Get naked,” Liam pants, slipping his fingers into the elastic of Zayn’s boxers and yanking them down. He yanks off Zayn’s top and traces his tongue across the Arabic writing on his collarbone, groaning as he feels Zayn’s cock twitch against his stomach. The twitching turns to rutting as Liam rolls them over, hovering over him to grab at the lube again. 

He snicks the cap open and kisses down Zayn’s body hurriedly, coating his fingers in the slippery substance with practiced ease. Pressing a kiss into the tattoo on Zayn’s hip, he lets the fingertip dance over his hole, rubbing over it lightly until Zayn’s squirming. He goes to push it in but Zayn suddenly rolls himself over underneath him, pushing himself onto his hands and knees with a groan.

“What…?” Liam starts but Zayn growls, pushing his arse back into Liam’s body.

“Fucking stick your fingers in me, Liam,” Zayn grits out, wiggling his hips and glaring over his shoulder. “I’m making it easier for you, why aren’t your fingers in me yet?”

“Right, right,” Liam mutters, his fingers going back to Zayn’s hole and rubbing over it again. He pushes one finger in past the ring of muscle, pumping it in and out until it’s gradually in to the knuckle. “Are you ready for another?” he asks lowly.

“Fuck,” Zayn snaps, pushing himself back on his knees. “Yes, Liam, c’mon!”

Liam lets a second finger slip inside his tight body, gently scissoring them because even though he’s eager to get inside the wonderful tight heat, he isn’t even sure how much sex Zayn has had. Oh god.

“Zayn,” he croaks suddenly, stilling his fingers. “You’re not… this isn’t your first time, is it?”

Zayn stops trying to fuck himself back on Liam’s fingers and turns his head. “N-not exactly. I’ve done it once. Was awful. Didn’t even come.” He pushes his arse back again. “I trust you though.”

“This is a terrible, terrible idea,” Liam murmurs, partly to Zayn but mainly to himself, suddenly overwhelmed by Zayn’s declaration of trust. 

“Liam, please!” Zayn whines. Liam sighs, scrunches his eyes closed, murmurs “fuck it” and starts pumping his fingers again. He’s too horny to give a damn right now. He then adds a third, kissing the swell of Zayn’s arse gently as he crooks his fingers.

“Shit,” Zayn moans, his entire body quivering as Liam’s fingers nudge his prostate. “Oh god, I’m ready, I’m ready, please Li!”

Liam crooks his fingers again, scissoring them a few more times before pulling them out and wiping them on Zayn’s discarded boxers. He seizes the condom and rolls it on, lining himself up with his entrance. He guides the tip inside and grips Zayn’s hips hard as he pushes in, eliciting an almost animalistic moan from his lips.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” Zayn chants, hands ruching up the sheets as he clutches at them like a lifeline. Liam feels like his skin is on fire, everything around him tight and wet and glorious. He runs his hands down the smooth plains of Zayn’s back while Zayn clenches around him.

“Okay, okay,” Zayn pants, shuffling back to press his arse snug against Liam’s hips. “Move, move _now_.”

Liam snaps his hips, pulling back and shoving back in. Zayn slumps forward, supporting himself up on his elbows so Liam can grip his shoulders and continue to drive in. Zayn thrusts his arse back in time with Liam’s thrusts, moaning as the head of Liam’s cock drags over his sweet spot. 

Liam is well aware it’s been a long time since he’s had a sober fuck but this… this isn’t just a fuck. He knows the difference between fucking (all he did at uni was fuck) and having sex (losing his virginity and maybe even the second time he was with Louis) but this feels like something more than that. The way Zayn chants his name as he grinds himself back into Liam, the way the sweat on his back tastes as Liam presses sweet kisses across him as he winces in pain as Liam thrusts harder than intended, the way Zayn’s moans drive him closer to the edge as he takes his prick in hand and starts jerking.

“Oh shit!” Zayn whimpers, “I’m not gonna last.”

“Me neither,” Liam wheezes, swiping his thumb sloppily over the head of Zayn’s dick. His hand is slick with sweat and slides up and down easily as Zayn bites down on his pillow and spills all over his hand, groaning Liam’s name into the fabric. Liam isn’t sure what pushes him over the edge (he assumes it’s a combination of the noises falling from Zayn’s lips and the way he tightens so deliciously around him) but he comes harder than he has since he was a teenager, slumping forward onto Zayn’s spent body.

“My god,” Liam murmurs, hurriedly pulling out when Zayn groans as he accidentally nudges his prostate again. “Holy fuck.”

“Oh wow,” Zayn says into the pillow. “That was…”

“Holy fucking, fuck, fuck, fuck ,” Liam chants as he ties the condom. “I just shagged my best friend’s little brother, oh god, oh god, oh god.”

“It was good though, wasn’t it?” Zayn says with a grin, turning over onto his back.

“It doesn’t matter how good it was!” Liam hisses, yanking his boxers off the floor. “I haven’t had sex in a long time, I was upset, I wasn’t thinking! _This never happened!_ ”

“Sure,” Zayn scoffs. “You can just fuck me and then fuck off, I get it. Whatever, Liam, that’s fucking great.”

“What did you expect?” Liam snaps, tugging his t-shirt back over his head. 

“A little courtesy, maybe?” He scrabbles himself up into the seating position. “Liam, I’m not a stupid kid anymore and it felt like you wanted it _just_ as much as I did.”

“I did, but…”

“But what?” Zayn snarls, tugging one of the pillows from above his head and covering himself with it. “You know what, Liam Payne, fuck you. I’m not going to tell Doniya if that’s what you’re worried about because it’s none of her damn business who I sleep with and I’m not going to give up on you because I know you want me like I want you. Now please either apologise or get the fuck out.”

“I’m getting the fuck out,” Liam snaps back, yanking his jeans up and buckling them hurriedly. “And you’re wrong, I don’t want you like you want me. I’m sorry this happened but I meant it. One time only!”

“Sure thing!” Zayn calls back with fake sweetness. “You know where the door is.”

He slams his bedroom door the second Liam’s out in the hallway and when Liam’s halfway down the stairs he hears an Arctic Monkeys song blare so loudly it makes him jump and rattles the pictures on the walls. He grabs his forgotten phone from the living room and hurries home, his mind racing and his stomach pounding.

This isn’t entirely his fault, Liam tries to reason with himself. He was upset and Zayn was there and a willing distraction to the bullshit at home and he hasn’t had sex since March, so who could blame him for getting sucked in by Zayn’s charm?

Even so, it’s not just like it’s anyone, it’s _Zayn._. Zayn, who’s always had a thing for him. Zayn, who Doniya would die to protect. Zayn, who Trisha made him promise he would keep an eye out for when they go to the same uni. Zayn, _his best friend’s younger fucking brother._

Obviously it takes two to tango but right now Liam’s too upset to be anything other than a little bit confused and a lot pissed off. And Zayn is wrong, so wrong, obviously. His attraction is purely physical; something that’s sprung up as quickly as it’s going to disappear. He hasn’t seen Zayn in a long time and there’s been a big change. That’s all there is to it.

(Maybe if he repeats this enough to himself, eventually he’ll start believing it.)

+

The thing is, Zayn’s a stubborn little fuck.

So two days later, when Liam’s lying in bed with his hands scrunched in his duvet so he’s not tempted to touch his achingly hard dick, and his phone vibrates with a new text message, he grabs it hurriedly, incredibly grateful for the distraction.

_hey liam it’s zayn, how are things? still in denial?_

Liam groans, balling his free hand into a fist and pounding it against his forehead.

_how did u get my number zayn_

_Doniya left her phone unlocked on the dining table. are you going to answer my question?_

_no._

_well that answers it perfectly. you are still in denial._

_pls dont do this zayn this isnt fair_

_no, what isn’t fair is how hard I get every night thinking about you when you supposedly don’t want me back_

_zayn stop!!!!!!!!_

_have you been thinking about me when you get yourself off liam?_

_enough zayn._

_that’s a yes._

Liam’s cock is currently betraying him massively by twitching at every single vaguely dirty thing Zayn sends him.

_its not a yes._

_it’s not a no though is it?_

Liam decides to bite the bullet. 

_its not a no but it doesnt mean its happening again_

_what if i told you i’m touching myself right now?_

Liam chokes on air.

_zayn!!!!! no!!!!!_

_i love it when you talk dirty_

_zayn this needs to stop_

_got two fingers in me and i’m wishing they were yours_

Liam’s cock blurts some precum at that and he shudders, gripping the base of his cock as he lets out a stupid involuntary moan. A second text comes in from Zayn and he opens it with shaky fingers.

_you’ve definitely got a hand on yourself now, i know it_

_u r such a little shit_

_;) ;) ;) ps adding a third_

Liam starts stroking himself slowly, going on the logic that he’s hard anyway so he might as well just go along with this.

_how does it feel? u stroking ur spot?_

_my fingers aren’t as good as yours babe_

Liam groans, remembering just how gloriously tight Zayn had been and how wonderfully responsive his little body had been when he was being fingered open. _Fuck._

 _u were so tight for me, so good_ Liam texts back and then hates himself.

_fuck liam next time i’m gonna ride you shit shit shitttttttt_

Ignoring the comment about next time, Liam starts pumping himself in earnest, tightening his grip as he remembers sinking into Zayn’s body, having everything around him feel like Zayn and taste like Zayn and smell like Zayn…

He bites down on his forearm as he comes, his sweaty fingers still gripping his phone as he spills all over his other fist. He exhales sharply with a sharp chuckle, panic once again washing over him like a fucking wave. He is such a fuck up.

_came so hard thinking about your fingers thank you for that liam xxxx_

_fucking hell zayn LAST TIME I MEAN IT!!!! dont text me again unless its important_

_thanks liam will dooooo xxxxxx_

Liam sighs, throwing his phone onto the other side of his bed before grabbing a tissue from his nightstand to clean his hand. Zayn is such a manipulative little fuck.

The problem is, now Zayn knows how much of a manipulative little fuck he is, he starts using it to his advantage, like making sure he answers the door whenever Liam goes round to see Doniya. He’s also managed to worm his way into the front of Liam’s brain every time he jerks off, which is really not good at all.

After a lot of heavy soul-searching and weighing up the pros and cons, Liam comes to a conclusion. He’s horny, bored and it’s not like Zayn is going to tell his sister because then they’d both get in trouble, so he decides if he’s going to do this, he might as well do it properly, right?

He picks a day when he knows that nobody but Zayn will be in. It takes him twice as long to walk there as it usually would and he ends up making himself jog the last two streets so he can’t lose his nerve. He knocks on the door and starts bouncing on the heels of his shoes, debating one final time whether it’s worth turning around and fleeing right now.

Zayn answers the door with one cocked eyebrow and such a smug look that Liam can barely stand it. He hops up the step and pushes Zayn inside the house, attaching their lips harshly. Zayn makes a surprised sound in the back of his throat but kisses back, winding his arms around Liam’s neck for support.

“If we’re going to do this,” Liam says as he pulls back, purposely digging his nails harshly into Zayn’s sides, “it stays between us and it’s just for the summer. Nothing changes because I _can’t_ risk my friendship with Doni, I really fucking can’t.”

“Please don’t mention my sister now,” Zayn groans, kissing him again. Liam shoves him harshly up against the wall, a hand cupping the back of his neck as his tongue explores the depths of Zayn’s mouth.

“You’re such a little shit, Zayn Malik, did you know that?” Liam growls, shoving his leg between Zayn’s thighs. “You’ve gotten right into my fucking head and all I can think about is your fucking mouth.”

Zayn snorts, gripping the back of Liam’s head tightly. “Do you want me to make your dreams a reality?”

Liam raises an eyebrow almost sarcastically. “I think you said something about riding me in your texts, actually.”

Zayn grins against his lips, walking backwards towards the stairs. Liam grabs under his thighs and lifts him up, not wanting to break the kiss when Zayn just tastes so damn good, like coffee and cigarettes again.

Liam opens Zayn up quickly, rolls on a condom and slicks himself up with one hand, Zayn riding the fingers of the other. He moves him forward quickly, gripping his cock and manoeuvring Zayn onto it. It takes Zayn a good few minutes to sink down onto it, nails scratching at Liam’s shoulders and back as he adjusts. Liam coaxes him through it gently, stroking him so the pleasure detracts from the pain and eventually Zayn rides them both to messy orgasms, one load inside a condom and one load all over his stomach.

“Are you going to hang around this time?” Zayn asks with a touch of mocking after Liam’s disposed in the bathroom.

“Do you want me to hang around?” Liam asks, reaching for his boxers.

“Liam,” Zayn groans, grabbing his own pants. “For fuck’s sake. I know you’re Doniya’s friend but I’ve known you my whole life. I thought we were kind of friends even without this little thing we’ve got going on.”

“We are,” Liam says, sitting down on the bed next to him. He reaches out to cup Zayn’s cheek. “I’ve always liked you a lot, but I guess… it never occurred to me to think of you as anything other than Doniya’s little brother.”

Zayn sighs, moving his face out of Liam’s hand. “Even if this just for the summer, Liam, which I respect totally… all of this…” He gestures to his tattoos, his earrings, his new hair. “All of it was for you, yeah? I just wanted to show you I wasn’t a kid.”

“Why did it matter?” Liam says gently, butterflies filling his stomach.

“It just… it just did,” Zayn says dumbly, scratching the back of his neck nervously. “I shouldn’t have told you that, I made it weird, I’m sorry.”

“No… I…” Liam starts. “It’s incredibly flattering, Zayn, that’s what it is.”

Zayn gives him a small smile, shuffling into his boxers. “Do you want to watch some telly or something?”

“Yeah, yeah I would,” Liam says, smiling back as he pulls up his jeans. “Has your mum left any samosas in the fridge?”

“Is the Pope Catholic?”

They both head downstairs and turn on the big TV, curling up awkwardly on the sofa together like they both know they want to sit close but aren’t sure how close is too close. Zayn heats them up some samosas and they eat them while a series of Come Dine with Me plays on. Liam really hopes the butterflies in his stomach are less to do with Zayn and more to do with something like a dodgy samosa but Zayn just smells so good and he’s warm and beautiful and he is so fucked right now.

Waliyha and Safaa get home at five and completely ignore them, both running straight upstairs to their bedrooms. Doniya gets home around half six, calls them both a pair of fairies and disappears into the kitchen, tutting about wasted summers. Liam almost instinctively tries to pull Zayn closer but then thinks better of it, instead choosing to slide out from under him to help Doniya in the kitchen.

So it becomes a regular thing. Three or four times a week, when they’re sure Trisha, Doniya and the girls are out Liam comes over and they hook up. Every time he leaves the house to walk the familiar root every fibre of Liam’s body tells him to turn around and not do it again but he can’t stop himself. Zayn is not only a little manipulative shit but he’s also one of the best fucks Liam’s ever had and he doesn’t want to stop.

And the thing is, on top of him being a great fuck, he’s so… Zayn. He’s adorable and funny and really fucking pretty and Liam loves hanging out with him. After the initial awkwardness of the first time they ended up watching TV together it’s now like a routine. They’ve started slowly working their way through Breaking Bad and it’s… domestic, almost. He’s almost starting to dread the end of summer because he doesn’t want this to stop.

He’s round at the Malik’s so much he starts cooking dinner some nights, helping Safaa with her homework, even painting Waliyha’s nails one night (to the great amusement of everyone else).

And telling Doniya he’s round there all the time because things are getting worse at home isn’t even a lie. He hardly sees Nicola or Ruth, who work and live with their boyfriends anyway and living at home is just stifling. His parents still tread round him like he’s a different person since coming out so he can’t even be bothered to make the effort anymore.

“I think Zayn’s seeing someone,” Doniya whispers to him one day as Zayn skips out the house whistling. “I’ve never seen the boy so happy.”

Liam freezes. “Yeah?” he asks from where he’s draining pasta in the sink. He tries super hard not to blush and tries to focus on the task in hand. 

“And he’s always texting,” Doniya continues as she sets the table. “But he won’t say a word, sneaky boy.”

“Oh,” Liam says dumbly, spooning pasta into bowls. “And he’s really happy, you say?”

“Yeah,” Doniya says. “Like, dopey happy. Bless his little heart.”

“That’s nice,” Liam says softly, the butterflies flooding his stomach again. He didn’t think they texted _that_ much. 

“I know,” Doniya grins. “I just wanna meet the lad so I can give him the ultimate big sister warning about breaking his heart.”

Liam titters nervously. “I bet,” he says, thrusting a bowl into her hands. “Cheese?”

“In the fridge,” Doniya says, raising an eyebrow. “What’s up with you?”

“Just tired,” Liam says, avoiding her eyes.

“Aww, is ickle Liam jealous because Zaynie’s no longer crushing on him?” she cackles, pinching his cheek.

“No,” Liam pouts, swatting her away. “I just wanna make sure he’s being treated well too. He’s important to me too, you know.”

“You should tell him that,” Doniya snorts. “Maybe then he’ll come running back.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Liam says, trying _so_ hard not to blush.

It doesn’t even occur to Liam how deep he’s fallen into this trap until one Friday night when he’s home alone. His parents have gone on holiday without him (he was invited, of course, but the idea of spending two weeks in a cabin in the south of France with just his parents for company was about as appealing as poking his own eye out) and Ruth and Nicola were out with their boyfriends. He’s basically drifted apart from everyone from home that isn’t Doniya or Danny so he texts Niall and they’d arranged to Skype. 

He’s just loading up his laptop when his phone vibrates loudly against the wood of his bedside table. He grabs it and sees it’s Zayn, putting it to his ear with a tentative “hello?”

“Liam?” Zayn says, his voice tight and frantic. “Liam, I…?”

“Hey, hey,” Liam says, sitting himself up and clutching the phone tighter to his ear. “What’s happened? Are you okay?”

“I… er… no, not really,” Zayn near whispers. “Can I… can I come to yours?”

“Of course,” Liam says immediately, closing the lid of his laptop. “You know where to go, right?”

“Yeah, I remember,” Zayn says with a small laugh. “I’ll be there in five.”

“Okay, babe,” Liam says. He hears Zayn’s breath hitch as he himself freezes at the term of endearment but then Zayn just hangs up. 

He hurriedly texts Niall saying something’s come up then pads downstairs, pacing the hallway in socked feet.

There’s a faint knocking on the door and Liam yanks it open. Zayn’s stood there, of course, his head bowed and his body trembling. When he looks up at Liam, he’s got a split lip and the start of a black eye and Liam gasps, tugging him inside by the hand. He crouches down to his height and cups his face, eyes scanning over all of him.

“Who the hell did this to you?” he says, his voice low and dangerous.

“Just…” Zayn chokes on his words, sniffing miserably. “Just these kids from school. Called me a faggot and a Paki, you know the drill.”

“I don’t actually,” Liam growls, standing up and linking their hands. “Come here.”

He leads Zayn into the kitchen and pulls a bag of peas out of the freezer. He wraps it in a tea towel and gives it to Zayn, who holds it over his eye and looks down. He then wets some kitchen roll under the warm tap and dabs the blood from his lip and chin. Zayn sniffles and avoids Liam’s eyes the whole time, until eventually Liam tosses the kitchen roll in the bin and goes back to his side.

“Why did they hurt you, Zayn?” he says, his hands finding their familiar resting place on Zayn’s hips. “This can’t have just been random.”

“Okay, it wasn’t,” Zayn sighs, burying his face in Liam’s shoulder. “I was… I was trying to buy some weed, yeah? And I usually go to this, like, gang of lads I knew from school. And… and one of them made a comment about how Pakis are cheap and how I wouldn’t want to pay full price, right? But I let it slide because I just wanted my weed, yeah?” 

Liam nods, hand sliding up and down Zayn’s back in what he hopes is a comforting way. 

“And then one of them said I definitely wouldn’t be able to afford it because…” He takes a deep breath and his arms tighten around Liam’s middle.

“One of them was, like, making comments about how poor we were because my Paki father left me with nothing and then…” 

“Ssssshhhh, babe, ssssshhhh,” Liam says gently as Zayn starts sobbing into his t-shirt. He tugs him through into the living room and cradles him on the sofa, letting him cry it out for as long as he needs.

“It’s not fair,” Zayn sniffs, hands clutching at Liam’s sides. “It’s not fucking _fair_!”

“I know, Zayn, I know,” Liam murmurs into his hair. He pulls back slightly to thumb away Zayn’s tears, kissing him between the eyes.

“Liam,” Zayn groans, shaking his head. “Please… please don’t.”

“Don’t what?” Liam asks, furrowing his brows.

“We don’t… you don’t kiss people like that if… _we don’t_ kiss each other like that.”

“I just wanted to make you feel better,” Liam says, taken aback. 

“You are making me feel better,” Zayn insists, “just can you not, like, do stuff like that?”

“O-okay,” Liam stutters, surprised.

“I-I should go, actually,” Zayn says, pulling himself out of Liam’s hold and standing up. “I don’t wanna intrude. I just… I wasn’t sure where else to go so I…”

“You’re not intruding, Zayn,” Liam says almost flatly. “I’m at home on my own on a Friday night. I wasn’t even watching TV.”

Zayn smiles shyly at the floor. “Oh.”

“I like having you around, Zayn,” Liam says hurriedly, because a part of him knows this is a terrible idea but a bigger part really wants Zayn to stay. “I want…” He sighs. “Fuck I don’t know what I want. What I do know is I don’t want you going back outside after you’ve been beaten up. So just… stay.”

Zayn pauses. “Okay,” he says after a second. “Sure.”

So for the first time all summer, they spend time together without the promise of a fuck or even the want to fuck. Liam orders them a pizza and they eat it in Liam’s room watching dumb YouTube videos and howling with laughter. There’s a point where Zayn reaches for the last piece of pizza and Liam ends up wrestling it off him, tickling his sides as he falls backwards onto the mattress as Zayn protests and cackles loudly.

Liam pins both Zayn’s wrists above his head, seizing the last piece of pizza and chucking it back in the box. He keeps Zayn’s wrists pinned, hovering over him as the tension in the air thickens. Zayn’s breathing heavily, his lips parted slightly as he stares up at him.

“Fuck,” Liam murmurs, still hovering over Zayn’s frame. “Zayn, I…”

“Kiss me,” Zayn demands. “I don’t care, just kiss me.”

“Your lip, Zayn, I…”

“Liam!”

Liam groans but bends down, catching Zayn’s lips in a light kiss. He moans into it as Zayn starts sucking on his bottom lip, moving his hands from Zayn’s wrist so he can link their fingers. Zayn’s hands move themselves to his face, cupping his cheeks and gripping tight as the kisses get more intense.

They’ve had a lot of sex, obviously, but their kisses have always been a part of that – just teeth and tongue and spit and passion. But this... this is something Liam is pretty sure he could do forever.

Zayn’s lips are warm and moist, his breath hot against Liam’s cheek as they pull away slightly for air. He rolls them over so they’re both on their sides, his hands exploring everywhere but never taking.

“Liam,” Zayn croaks, eyes wide as he pulls away. “This isn’t… I mean…”

“Oh god,” Liam whispers, almost hysterically. “Doniya’s going to fucking kill me.”

“Again with the talking about my sister at crucial moments,” Zayn groans, throwing his head back.

“Oh god,” Liam repeats, this time in exasperation. “You’re such a little shit.”

“Excuse me?” Zayn squeaks.

“Okay so here’s the thing,” Liam says. “So basically I had a really shit year at uni and I did a lot of stupid things and I slept around and Doniya kept telling me to stop that because if I wanted to find someone I wanted to be with I needed to stop looking. So I stopped and I thought this thing with you could just be my summer fun but…” He stops. “Maybe I needed to stop looking because the person I needed was right in front of me this whole time.”

Zayn’s face goes from one of shock to a huge splitting grin. “You mean that?”

“I…” Liam runs his thumb across Zayn’s cheekbone. “All I’m sure of is that I want you. If you’re willing to have me, of course.”

“Jesus fucking Christ, Liam,” Zayn says with an eye roll. “I’ve been trying to seduce you into feelings all summer. You are so dense.”

“And that is why you are a little shit,” Liam grins, pecking his lips. Zayn grins, draping an arm over Liam’s waist.

“So what are we?” he asks, tracing patterns into Liam’s pillowcase lightly.

“We are… boyfriends? Secret boyfriends?”

“Secret boyfriends,” Zayn says, testing it out on his tongue.

“Just for now,” Liam assures, his fingers still stroking Zayn’s cheek. “Because Doniya might kill me and your mum might kill me too and I don’t want to die if I don’t need to.”

“You wanna break up after summer?” Zayn asks nervously, his hand covering Liam’s on his cheek.

“No, _no_ ,” Liam tells him. “Not anymore. But I don’t… you might meet someone at uni, you might…”

“Oh shut _up_ , Liam!” Zayn snaps. “I’ve been gone for you since I was in Year Ten. I’m fully dedicated to this if you are.”

Liam stares into his eyes, stunned. “S-since Year Ten?”

“Since I realised I like boys,” Zayn says with a nonchalant shrug. “You were, like, this giant out of reach fantasy and I just… I never stopped fantasising.”

“So when you said you did all your changes f-for me, you meant that?”

Zayn sighs. “I’ve never lied or exaggerated anything, really. When Baba died, it was the worst thing ever but… but I felt like I could come out, you know? Like I knew Mum wouldn’t mind and Doniya had you and… and I heard you crying to her once before you came out and Baba was saying to Mum how you weren’t the kind of person he wanted Doni hanging around with so I kept my mouth closed and… then it was all so sudden, you know? And then I could get tattoos and be gay and cut my hair and dress a little better because I didn’t have to pretend anymore. So I became who I wanted to be and I hoped and it did and I…” He stops and just grins over to Liam. “Yeah, it was all for you, ultimately.”

“Fuck,” Liam says and kisses him again. Zayn smiles into it, pulling Liam closer by the hips and tracing his hand up and down his side.

Liam pulls back suddenly, confused. “Wait, wait a second. Why would you let me just fuck you all summer then?”

“Because I…” Zayn pauses and closes his eyes for a second. “I wanted you for whatever you’d give me. Even if that was just sex.”

“You let me basically take your virginity, Zayn. I still feel bad about that,” Liam says mournfully.

“Well, don’t,” Zayn says fiercely. “If anyone in the world was gonna take it properly, there’s nobody else I would have wanted to, Liam, and I mean that.”

“But… I was such a dick to you,” Liam says, tugging him closer. 

“It was kinda hot,” Zayn admits with a small shrug. “And I wanted you. I wasn’t thinking, I just… I wanted you, and if that was the only way Liam Payne would go near his best friend’s stupid kid brother, then…”

Liam kisses him again. “Don’t call yourself that. You’re Zayn. _My_ Zayn.”

“Your Zayn,” he repeats, his face breaking out into an even wider grin. He holds out his hand for Liam to take. “Okay, boyfriend.”

Liam kisses him between the eyes. “Can I do that now?”

Zayn grins. “Yeah, you can. As long as you’re not just doing it to make me feel better.”

Liam raises an eyebrow. “Isn’t that how all this started? You trying to make me feel better?”

“Well, how else was I going to convince you to do it?” Zayn drawls. “I took advantage of you that day, I don’t know why you feel so bad about it.”

“This is so fucked up,” Liam groans, resting their foreheads together. “We both have gone about this so badly.”

“No, _you_ went about this badly,” Zayn grins, “ _I_ , on the other hand, just worked to get what I wanted.”

“You manipulative little shit,” Liam groans. “I hate you.”

Zayn’s still grinning, pressing his lips into Liam’s as he pouts. 

“Can I stay the night?”

Liam nods, his fingers tracing over Zayn’s bruises. “Of course you can. I don’t want my boy going back outside looking like that.”

Zayn smiles softly, reaching into his jeans to pull out his phone. “I’ll text my mum, tell her I’m staying at a friend’s,” he murmurs, resting his head on Liam’s shoulder. 

“What are you going to tell her about your face?”

“Probably the truth,” he shrugs. “She’s pretty cool about most stuff.” He pulls a face. “Well, maybe I won’t tell her I was buying weed.”

Liam snorts. “Yeah, don’t give Trisha a heart attack. You’re gonna give her enough of a heart attack when you tell her you’re in a relationship with me.”

Zayn goes rigid. “Y-you wanna tell them?”

“I mean… n-not yet,” Liam says nervously. “But if we last then we’re going to have to at some point, aren’t we?”

“We’re going to last, Liam” Zayn says with an eye roll. “I’m going to make sure of it.”

“Well, I have no intention of letting you go any time soon,” Liam says. “I was already dreading the end of summer.”

“Have you finally realised how irresistible I am?”

“Yeah, don’t get ahead of yourself, you little shit,” Liam says, faux-glaring at him.

“Yeah, well,” Zayn says, pressing a sweet kiss into Liam’s mouth.

Eventually they settle down under the covers, tucked up in just t-shirts and boxers. Liam wraps his arms around Zayn’s shoulders and they settle down together, warm and happy.

It’s the first time Liam goes to sleep with Zayn in his arms and when he wakes up and sees Zayn snuffling softly against his chest, he realises he is so fucked.

*

Unfortunately, they don’t get to wake up together again for a few weeks.

Doniya’s internship finishes so she’s home a lot more and then her and Danny have a fight and refuse to speak so Liam spends all his time with her, eating Ben & Jerry’s and listening for hours about why he’s in the wrong over her. She refuses to leave the house and just lies in bed moping, which makes it very difficult to have sex with her little brother.

It’s just hard because Zayn is always there as well and now they’ve called themselves a couple, Liam just wants to be with him all the time. Now he’s spent the night with Zayn in his bed he wants to wake up to that every day but he obviously can’t just stay the night because they’ve decided not to tell anyone, especially not Doniya while she’s in such a foul mood all the time.

They manage cheeky snogs and one fumbled hand job while Doniya’s in the shower but that’s it, really. Apart from that, it’s all muffled phone sex at night and text conversations about each other’s days and how much they miss each other.

“I just don’t know what I’m going to do, Li,” Doniya moans one day as she and Liam curl up in her bed. It’s a week and a half before they’re due to move back to uni. Louis, Harry, Niall and Liam are sharing a three bedroom house about a five minute walk from campus and Danny and Doniya were planning on sharing a studio on campus again but they both haven’t spoken for three weeks. “I miss him so much but he’s such an arsehole!”

“I know, Doni, I know,” Liam says reassuringly, stroking her hair.

“And the worst part is,” Doniya continues, eyes filling with tears, “I would completely forgive him if he admitted he was in the wrong, _fuck_.”

“Babe,” Liam says, wiping his thumb across his cheek, “you’ve been together since you were sixteen. You’re gonna make it through this. You love each other too much to break up over a stupid fight.”

“God, I do love him,” Doniya whines, burying her face in a pillow. “I just fucking hate him too.”

“Talk to him, sweetheart,” Liam says, rolling her over so they’re face to face. 

“He hasn’t tried to talk to me!” Doniya shrills, wiping at her face with the back of her hand.

“Well, you did tell him to get the fuck away from you and not to come back,” Liam points out, “and you were pretty fucking scary about it.”

Doniya scrunches her face up, pressing the heels of her hands into her eyes to stop the fresh wave of tears. She chokes out a loud, messy sob, so loud that once Liam’s bundled her up into his arms again there’s a tentative knocking on her bedroom door.

“ _Bhaji?_ ” comes Zayn’s voice, opening the door the tiniest crack. “Are you okay?”

“No, I’m fucking not!” Doniya shrieks, hands pressed against Liam’s chest as he rocks her back and forth. Liam gives him an apologetic look over her head and mouths “sorry, babe” as she shrieks “get out, Zayn!”

Zayn closes the door quickly and Liam holds her through the tears and chants of “I need him, I need him”, though he could have told her that weeks ago and he really wants to make sure Zayn’s okay. “I’m going to get you some tissues, okay darling?” he murmurs, pressing a kiss into her temple.

He lets himself out her room quickly before strolling down the hall and opening the door to Zayn’s room. He’s sat on his bed with a book in his hand but he drops it the second Liam’s in the room. “Is she okay?”

“Zayn,” Liam groans, “she needs Danny. There’s only so much of this I can do. Will you go and get him, please?”

“Sure,” Zayn replies, grabbing a pair of shoes from the floor and pulling them on. “Is she okay?”

Liam shakes his head. “I think it’s all caught up with her today because she’s realised they’re living together in, like, ten days.”

“Shit, I forgot about that,” Zayn says, jumping to his feet. “Okay, I’ll go. Kiss me quick?”

Liam grabs him by the shoulders and pulls him in, moulding their lips together for a few seconds before pulling back. Zayn grins, pecks him on the cheek and then ducks out the door. Liam can hear him clipping down the stairs and then the front door slams, so he grabs a load of toilet paper and goes back to Doniya’s room. She’s sat up with her phone in hand, texting away furiously. 

“What took you so long?” she snaps and Liam holds up his hands in defence.

“I was talking to Zayn in the hallway, chill man!”

“God I’m sorry, I…” she tosses her phone to the side. “Even Harry says I’m being an arse,” she grumbles, gesturing to her phone. “I just…”

“You hate losing, for one,” Liam says, plopping back down on the bed. “And you hate confrontation so you avoid it. And it’s not just anyone, it’s Danny, who I’m pretty sure is going to be the father of your children so you’re extra stubborn.”

“I hate the way I think,” Doniya grumbles, snuggling back up into Liam’s arms. “But you’re fucking right, you arse.” She buries her face back into Liam’s shoulder and just lies there sulking until Liam hears the door open. Two sets of feet can be heard tapping up the stairs and then Doniya’s bedroom door is being opened and Danny’s there. He looks haggard and pale, like he hasn’t slept properly in weeks and his bottom lip starts trembling when they make eye contact.

“Baby?” he says tentatively and that’s all it takes for Doniya to be scrabbling out of Liam’s arms and into his, throwing her arms around his neck as she sags into him. Zayn grabs Liam’s wrist and tugs him out the room as Doniya starts crying again.

“Fuck,” Liam breathes out, “I really hope they get it sorted.”

“They will,” Zayn says firmly. “They’re made for each other. And they’ve got a lot to talk about so why don’t we make up for lost time?” His fingers run down Liam’s chest to the waistband of his joggers and he grins up at him wickedly. Liam grins, kissing him quick before yanking him out his room. 

“Doniya? I’m gonna go!” he calls, practically dragging Zayn down the stairs and out the door to his house.

Two hours later, they’re lying in Liam’s bed naked and sated as they kiss softly.

“Hey,” Liam says, brushing some of the hair off of Zayn’s fringe. “When do you want to tell Doniya?”

Zayn groans. “I’m still half-hard and you mention my sister again?!”

Liam grins. “Well, I’m sorry, but it’s something we have to address and we haven’t had much alone time recently to discuss it!”

“Soon,” Zayn says slowly, linking their fingers on top of the duvet. “Wait until she and Danny have had lots of happy make up sex and she’s in a good mood again.”

“Now you had to go and mention your sister’s name while your dick’s hard, didn’t you?” Liam teases. Zayn groans, closing his eyes and shaking his head rapidly until Liam captures his lips in a kiss again. They kiss happily until Zayn’s stomach lets out a huge rumble and they pull apart with a giggle.

“Okay, so that was embarrassing,” Zayn groans, throwing his head back onto the pillow. Liam laughs, kissing Zayn again and shuffling out of bed. “C’mon babe, I’ll order us a pizza. My parents aren’t home tonight, they’re at some kiss assy dinner party with Dad’s work so you can stop over and everything!”

“I’d like that,” Zayn grins, pushing back the duvet and grabbing his boxers and shirt. “Can I eat in my pants?”

“You can do whatever you like in your pants,” Liam snorts, yanking his own t-shirt over his head.

Zayn pulls his boxers up and wiggles his hips suggestively as he walks towards the bathroom.

“Manipulative little shit!” Liam calls after him and he hears Zayn chuckle as he closes the bathroom door. He hears the toilet flush and then Zayn’s strutting back, winking as he does so.

“You’re so…” Liam says, grabbing him and kissing him hard. Zayn makes a surprised sound but kisses back, sliding his hands down Liam’s bare back and squeezing his arse.

Both are so caught up in kissing they don’t hear the spare key open the front door. They _do_ hear Doniya’s squeal of “LIAM!” but only when it’s too late.

Doniya stands looking at them through the bannister halfway up the stairs. They’re both in their boxers, both back on the way to hard and Zayn is groping Liam’s arse. There is really no way this can be disguised.

“What the fuck,” Doniya growls, “is this?”

“Err,” Liam stammers, because really he has no words.

“Y-y-you? And my baby brother?” she snarls, stamping up the stairs and towards Liam, pushing him away from Zayn and standing right up in his space. “YOU AND MY BABY BROTHER?! I fucking… I was there for you this _entire year_ and you repay me by seducing my little brother?! WHAT THE FUCK, LIAM?”

“Doniya, it’s not…” Zayn starts, but Doniya holds her hand out in his face to keep him quiet.

“Doniya, I…”

“My baby brother!” she shrieks again, hitting Liam hard on the chest. “You little fucking slag, Liam! Can’t keep it in your pants for a fucking summer so you pick on the boy you _know_ has fancied you for years! Is that why you spent all your summer at my fucking house, Liam? In my fucking house with my fucking baby brother?!” She chokes back a sob. “You’re my best friend, Liam, how the hell could you do this to me?!”

“Doniya, it’s not just sex!” Liam shouts, reaching out for Zayn’s hand but she swats it away. “And we both want…”

“Don’t you dare tell me what my brother wants!” Doniya barks, picking Zayn’s clothes off the floor and throwing them at him. “Zayn, we’re leaving!”

“I’m not leaving!” Zayn cries, reaching for Liam’s hand again. “He’s not a little slag, Doniya…”

“You don’t know him like I do!” Doniya shrieks. “This stops, _now_! Danny!”

“Doniya, no!” Zayn shouts at the same time Liam yells “Doniya, I’m in love with him!”

Doniya, Zayn and Danny (who has just appeared in the doorway) all freeze.

“W-what?” Doniya finally stammers out, all the colour draining from her face. 

“I’m in love with him, okay?” he repeats, pulling Zayn into his arms at last. “I love Zayn.”

There’s a long pause. “I love you too,” Zayn finally says, turning around so he can wrap his arms around Liam’s waist. “God, Liam, I fucking love you.”

“Do you mean that?” Doniya demands, eyes wide and shiny with fresh tears. “You’re not just saying that?”

“Fuck, no, I…” Liam stammers, wrapping his arms around Zayn properly. “I think I’ve loved him for a while but I…” He swallows. “I had to make sure because I told Zee again and again I couldn’t risk my friendship with you. And we were gonna tell you before we went back to uni anyway.” He wipes his eyes with the back of his hand that isn’t holding Zayn close. “He’s… he’s my someone, Doni.”

Zayn looks up at him with a soft grin and Liam kisses him in between the eyes. Doniya lets out an actual sob this time, letting Danny wrap her in his arms and murmur into her ear.

“You fucking arseholes,” she sniffles, eventually opening her arms and hugging them both. “Why didn’t you tell me?!”

“Because we didn’t want you to freak out,” Zayn says, manoeuvring himself so he’s standing flush to Liam’s chest. “And also because we only decided to be boyfriends, like, four weeks ago. We were just making sure it was what we wanted.”

“We’ve been seeing each other for most of summer though,” Liam puts in, kissing Zayn’s shoulder. “He’s very persuasive, this one.”

“Oh god,” Doniya, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand again. “You two are…”

“Doniya, what the fuck?!” Liam says suddenly, grabbing her hand. “What the hell is this?”

Doniya chuckles wetly, holding out her hand properly so the pair can see the simple diamond now sitting on her ring finger. “That’s what I came over here to tell you,” she sniffs. “We’re…”

“Doniya!” Liam yells again, letting go of Zayn and taking Doniya in his arms instead. “You’re getting married!”

“Congratulations!” Zayn yells, leaning forward to bro hug Danny. “I knew you guys would fix it!”

“This is the strangest day ever,” Doniya says into Liam’s shoulder. “And I’m sorry, I’m so sorry I called you a slag. I was just…”

“Don’t worry,” Liam interrupts, pulling back and kissing her on the forehead. “I get it. It’s not just anyone. But I’m serious about this, Doni, I promise.”

“I know,” Doniya whispers, hugging him again. “I can tell, don’t worry.” She pulls back and slaps him on the cheek. “But if you hurt him I’ll kick you so hard between the legs that your balls will fall out your eye sockets, do you hear me?”

“Fuck, babe, that’s nasty!” Danny chastises, pulling her back into his arms. Zayn grimaces and steps back into Liam’s arms.

“Please don’t, he has really nice balls.”

Danny makes a choking sound, Liam flushes the deepest shade of red he’s ever gone and Doniya slaps him.

“And that’s where we leave!” She flips them both off and spins around, dragging Danny out the room. “When are you telling Mum, by the way?”

“Ummm, never?”

“Oh, please, she’ll be thrilled!”

“Oh I know,” Zayn says. “But she’ll be all LIAM, COME LOOK AT ZAYN’S BABY PICTURES and that’s not happening!”

“Oh please!” Liam whines, kissing the back of Zayn’s neck. Doniya pulls a face. 

“Bye, you disgusting… ew, no, ew my brother and best friend, nope, ew, BYE!”

“Bye, you two!” Danny calls. They hear the door slam and then Zayn is spinning in his arms and kissing him hard. Liam smiles into the kiss and pulls Zayn in by the hips, gripping them tight as Zayn cups his face.

“I love you,” Zayn breathes into his mouth. “I’m pretty sure I always have.”

“I love you too, you manipulative little shit,” Liam smiles back. “And that could have been so much worse.”

“I can’t believe she found us half naked,” Zayn groans, resting his head on Liam’s chest. “Although that’s better than fully naked, I guess.”

“ _So_ much better than fully naked,” Liam says. He kisses Zayn again, though they’re grinning so hard that kissing is tricky.

“I’m still hungry,” Zayn eventually whines against Liam’s lips. Liam laughs and pulls away, smacking Zayn’s arse lightly in the direction of downstairs. 

He orders them a half and half pizza of their favourites and they curl up together on the sofa properly, an episode of Breaking Bad playing on the flatscreen.

“I really do love you, you know,” Liam says into Zayn’s hair. “I feel like an idiot because we could have been doing this for so much longer than we have been.”

“Don’t feel like an idiot,” Zayn tells him. “I was willing to wait, in case you hadn’t got that by now.”

“I know but…” Liam starts and Zayn kisses him to shut him up.

The kisses grow heated and Zayn gasps into his mouth as Liam’s large hand cups him through his boxers. “Liam!” he stammers. “Take me to bed.”

So Liam does, opening him up with his tongue and gentle fingers. He slides inside him without a condom for the first time and he revels in how beautifully Zayn’s back arches as he bottoms out, kissing him through most of the initial sting.

That night is the second time Zayn falls asleep in Liam’s arms, warm and fucked out and in love. And when Liam awakes to Zayn’s mouth tight and warm around his prick, he thinks he would like this for a very long time.

*

Telling Trisha is easy like they thought it was going to be. She squeals and kisses Liam hard all over his face, squealing about beautiful grandchildren from both her babies. Zayn groans and hides behind Liam as Trisha pulls out an album of pictures of them as children but Liam kisses him on the temple and revels in them.

When Trisha starts crying because she comes across a picture of Zayn and Yaser together Liam hugs her tight and tells her he’ll love her son in a way that Yaser would want him to, which makes her cry even harder. That night, Liam lets Zayn cry into his chest about how much he would want Yaser to see how happy he is and how it isn’t fair that he can't. 

They go back to uni the week after; Zayn moving into halls and Liam, Louis, Harry and Niall moving into their house. It’s already a complete tip by the end of fresher’s week and none of them can cook except Harry but Zayn and Doniya and Danny and Perrie are still always round, Zayn sleeping over more often than not.

Liam falls more and more in love with his stupid boy every day. Whenever he brings home a grade on a painting that he’s proud of and his face lights up, Liam loves him a little more. When he cooks Liam a shitty dinner because he’s been in the library all day, he loves him a little more. When he wakes him up for a 9am lecture with a blowjob, he loves him a lot more.

And the thing is, he can’t imagine him ever thinking anyone other than Zayn being his someone.

Doniya corners him the night before his and Zayn’s three month anniversary, asking tentatively if he’s still with Zayn because he wants to be or because he’s scared of her. Liam chokes on his drink.

“You know I’m, like, stupidly gone for him, right? Like the idea of having sex with someone else genuinely makes me feel a bit ill.”

“Did you have to answer it like that?” Doniya says, swatting his arm. “I just wanted to check and I also haven’t seen you properly in _ages_. Tell my brother I want you back.”

“I’ve missed you,” Liam admits, pulling her into a hug. “How are things with your fiancé?”

Doniya shrieks muffledly into his shoulder. “I still can’t believe I’m engaged!”

 

“I can’t believe you’re engaged,” Liam says, taking her hand to look at the ring again. “I told you there wasn’t a fight so big you two couldn’t bounce back.”

“It was a big one, though,” Doniya says quietly.

“What even happened, babe? You never said.”

Doniya sighs. “I, er, I had a pregnancy scare.”

“You WHAT?”

Doniya shushes him frantically. “I told Danny I wouldn’t tell anyone, shut _up_!”

“Okay, so then what?” Liam hisses.

Doniya looks down at her hands. “I wasn’t, by the way. I took a test and it was positive so I freaked but I went to the doctors and they said I wasn’t; that the test was a false positive because of some antibiotics I’d been taking. _Anyway_ , he was like we’d keep it, right? And I was like erm, no, I am not dropping out of uni. And things just got out of hand from there, which was pretty shit but it’s fine because it bought us closer and now…” She holds up her hand and Liam nods, squeezing her tight.

“Let’s never go this long without a catch up again?” he says, kissing her temple. 

“Stop spending all your time shagging my brother then,” she groans, though there’s no bite behind it.

“Let’s go out,” Liam suggests. “You, me, Danny, Zayn, Niall and Perrie, Haz and Lou.”

“Yeah, okay,” Doniya agrees. “But I swear to god, Liam, if you drag him off to the loos then our friendship is _over!_

Liam simply grins in response.

And later that night when they’re in some nameless club and Niall and Perrie are dancing closely with their foreheads touching and Danny is spinning Doniya round the dance floor and Harry and Louis are grinding up against each other, Liam pulls Zayn in close and kisses him long and hard to the sway of the song. Because he’s got what he craves. And it’s pretty fucking perfect.


End file.
